Silver police cars

I was in one of the Royal Parks a year or so ago and Danielle had stopped to watch a juggler. Watching jugglers or mime artists makes me want to commit hate-crimes, so I wandered off.

I soon became aware that I was a man walking aimlessly in a park on a sunny day. A large arrow appeared above my head that said, “Pervy weirdo”.

Feelings of self-consciousness increased when I saw a policeman sitting in his silver car. He was looking at me. I decided to allay his suspicions by going to talk to him.


“I appear to have mislaid my girlfriend.”

Policeman laughed. Phew.

“It’s not a bad day to get lost, is it,” he said, alluding to the fact that it was bloody hot. Are there “good days” to be mugged or murdered?

“No. It’s nice.”

Long silence. I start to panic.

“Why are so many unmarked police cars silver?”

He looked at me.

“Because it’s easier to sell them at auction when we are finished with them.”

There. You learn something new every day.